Thursday, February 08, 2007
My nuttiest Hyper-Thyroid moment
My craziest moment was while driving in really treacherous, icy, snowy conditions. I was on my way back from work in my old ’86 Toyota Camry. This car didn’t like snow! A couple of years earlier, in really bad conditions on the Garden State Parkway, I had actually done a 360 when forced to break – not hard, I might add! I was keeping a safe distance from the car in front of me, doing a shade under 20mph. I was shown no such courtesy by the driver behind me. And this annoyed me. I hate tailgaters at the best of times – it is unnecessary, dangerous and moronic. But in treacherous conditions?! I took my foot off the accelerator for a short while and motioned with my hand for the guy to keep his distance. When I sped up, so did he. Plan B: Brake lightly, motion more angrily, slow down for longer. His reaction was the same. He was never more than 5 or 6 feet behind me. Now I have gone 20mph on an Interstate when followed in this manner in good conditions. I once came to a dead stop in the fast lane on the NJ Turnpike when I had my kids in the car. My attitude is, if you hit me at a slow speed, I’ll be able to control my car. But at 70mph, on a busy road, I’ll probably die. But this guy was just too much!
I didn’t have the option of braking sharply to scare the shit out of him. So I stopped the car and jumped out. Picture it! A skinny guy of about 40 (looked less), standing barely 5’7” tall with long dark curly hair, who is bright red in the face, jumps out of his car in a business shirt, top two buttons unfastened; no jacket or coat; and starts screaming – almost spitting at someone who didn’t dare open his window, even though he looked several inches taller than me: “Fucking dickforbrains! If you wanna kill yourself, go find a tree to wrap yourself around! But leave me out of it!!” He looked terrified! After that, he was a good boy!